Smiles!

Benny in the Desert

In the great desert lived a band of nomads. Their leader, Benny, had risen to his rank due to his magnificent beard. His people believed a man’s strength and courage came from his beard, and thus the man with the biggest beard was their chief.
After leading the band for many years, Benny began to fell uncomfortable wearing the beard, in this hot and dusty land. He wanted to shave it off, so he called his council together to get their advice.
When he said he wanted to shave, the councilmen were shocked. One said, “Do you not remember the ancient legend, Sire. The leader who removes his beard is cursed and made into a piece of earthenware.”
Benny had heard this legend, but being a modern man, he scoffed at the tale.
Being headstrong, he went ahead and cut and scraped away his once magnificent beard. As the final whisker was cut off, a huge dust storm came up. It lasted only a few seconds, and when it cleared, there was a man-sized clay vessel where only moments before had stood their leader.
The council then knew the legend must be true. Their conclusion? “A Benny shaved is a Benny urned.” t

 

Questions that make you go “Hmm”

  1. A stitch in time saves nine what?
  2. After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?
  3. Are part-time band leaders semi-conductors?
  4. Are there any unguided missiles?
  5. Are you breaking the law if you drive past those road signs that say “Do Not Pass”?
  6. Are you telling the truth if you lie in bed?
  7. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
  8. Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
  9. Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawnshop?
  10. Can you get cavities in your dentures if you use too much artificial sweetener?
  11. Could crop-circles be the work of a cereal killer?
  12. Crime doesn’t pay… does that mean my job is a crime?
  13. Day light savings time – why are they saving it and where do they keep it?
  14. Did Noah keep his bees in archives?
  15. Do boxer shorts box?
  16. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
  17. Do clowns wear really big socks?
  18. Do fish get thirsty?
  19. Do hummingbirds hum because they don’t know the words?
  20. Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
  21. Do people in Australia call the rest of the world ‘up over’?
  22. Do pilots take crash-courses?
  23. Do Roman paramedics refer to IV’s as “4’s”?
  24. Do Scottish Terriers get Scotch Tape worms?
  25. Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers?
  26. Do steam rollers really roll steam?
  27. Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
  28. Do witches run spell checkers?
  29. Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
  30. Does a man-eating shark eat women, too?
  31. Does killing time damage eternity?
  32. Does that screwdriver belong to Phillip?
  33. Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
  34. Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool?
  35. Have you ever talked into an acoustic modem?
  36. Have you ever wondered?
  37. How can someone “draw a blank”?
  38. How can there be self-help “groups”?
  39. How can you tell when it is time to tune your bagpipes?
  40. How come chocolate milk doesn’t come from brown cows?
  41. How come I can pick my ears but not my nose?
  42. How come wrong numbers are never busy?
  43. How dead is the Dead Sea?
  44. How did a fool and his money get together?
  45. How did the man who invented cottage cheese know he was done?
  46. How do I set my laser printer on stun?
  47. How do they get a deer to cross at that sign.
  48. If Jimmy cracked corn and I don’t care, why is there a song about him?
  49. How does a thermos know if it is supposed to keep something hot or cold?
  50. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why’s it still #2?
  51. Is there another word for “synonym?”
  52. If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
  53. Isn’t is it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
  54. What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?
  55. What’s another word for thesaurus?
  56. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?